Chakramana is an image that I painted in Fall of 2004, while recovering from my first total hip revision. This image represents the flow of all good things, transforming fate into unknown destiny. As Deepak Chopra would say, this image represents non-local mindfulness, or we create that which we perceive. Chakramana reminds me that when I am open hearted, open minded, and follow my spirit, there is no suffering, no pain, no fear. Chakramana reminds me that through acceptance, one can experience feelings of complete happiness and a sense of knowingness that the vastness of the universe is within. I imagined the spirit self hovering above me was removed from the constraints of the physical body. The birds to the right represent the support and love of all my friends, family and neighbors that I have encountered throughout decades of healing with metastatic malignant melanoma.
Though I had healed my body of metastatic cancer, my physical body was experiencing what the doctors label, radiation induced osteo-neurcrosis. Undergoing so much radiation throughout the previous decade left my bones fragile and in need of reinforcement. The image relates to my having to lose my identification with the physical body, and how health returned once I recognized the power of visualization. As a former bathing suit model, this was my most difficult task in the healing process, yet once I recognized the power of my spirit, and listened to the quiet stillness within, everything became like a symphony. I experienced deep love and appreciation for my body, regardless of it’s condition. Guided by the chakra system, health permeates from the formless figure. The excitement of freedom unites with all who dare to journey and live from the inside out.
When a dear friend asked me to express what I had done to heal my body of cancer, all I could really do was draw a picture for her. I began outlining an image on some old used canvas. As I listened to her questions, I began drawing my thoughts and responses while expressing that I was not my body. I knew intuitively that as long as I followed my heart, and was guided by my spirit there were no obstacles in my way, only the ones that I had previously imagined in my mind. I was no longer in awe of the medical profession and I felt free, like a bird, released from statistics, out into the unknown, ever new, rejuvenated. I felt healed and complete, thus Chakramana is my expression of INSPIRATION.
The medium I used, began with using old makeup and my makeup brushes on a 3 ft. x 2 ft. canvas. It was a fluke, as I began to draw my feelings of transformation. As friends came to visit, they brought various paints, colored pencils, canvasses, and brushes for my use as I continued to paint my before and after images. I also refer to Chakramana as my alter ego, the image of self who is not bound by the limitations of the ego self, or mind. Chakramana reminds me to become one with the universe and continues to inspire me whenever I am feeling Out of Strings.
More to come,